Three techniques to control your emotions

Mindfulness is the practice of self awareness popularized by budhism hundreds of years ago. Since these early times, mindfulness has swept the globe as a way to stay calm, cool, and collected no matter what is thrown at you.

This is all good in practice, but what about when things get difficult? Our brains are divided up into two parts that work in very different ways. One half of our brains deals with our immediate gut reactions, and rules most of our lives. It's the autopilot that takes us to work so we don't really have to pay attention, and the quick decisions that help us choose day to day clothing or what to have for breakfast.

When things get tricky, and your quick decision side is stumped, half two comes into play. This is our 'thinking' half, and perhaps the half we are generally more aware of. When you have a big decision to make (or maybe just bigger than usual) this side takes over and helps you figure the problem out.

The problem is, our thinking side doesn't always kick in when it really should. We've all lost our cool on a coworker or family member when they pushed our buttons one too many times. In this case, we went with our immediate reaction, instead of giving our slower but more thoughtful brain time to kick in.

Mindfulness can help put the reins back on the reactive side of your brain, so you have a little more time to think before acting in a way you might regret later. Fortunately, it's also something you can do in just three (not always easy) steps.

Recognize the emotion

Feel the fire of anger spreading through every vein in your body? Your first goal is going to be to recognize that emotion for what it is. Although most of us know the words for angry, sad, or happy, we don't always recognize our own emotions immediately. If you can recognize the emotion first, you are well on your way to controlling it.

 Count to 10

Ever see people in movies counting slowly to 10 when they're frustrated or angry? They're doing it to help them gain control of their emotions, and you can use it too. Counting to 10 gives you a chance to collect and figure out if what happened is really worth blowing your top over or not.

React

Those 10 seconds give your brain enough time to catch up with you. Now you can react. Maybe you're still angry and you still yell, but at least now you're more in control and aware of your emotions. Most of the time however, your brain has realized that there are other, calmer ways to address the situation, and you look polished and professional—not the topic of gossip for everyone.

 Being in control of your emotions is critical, especially if you are angling for a leadership position. Use these tips to help you stay in control.