Type, “How to be a better spouse” into any random search engine, and you’re likely to get a lot of advice that sounds like it came from the 18th century. Wanting to be a better partner is normal, but you don’t have to put on a bonnet and clean the house extra nice to be “better.” Here’s some modern advise for being a better spouse to your partner.

Be Supportive of Your Spouse

Does your wife want to embrace a healthier lifestyle and lose some weight? Does your husband want to enter a marathon even though he’s never gotten off the couch? Being supportive of your spouse, even if they’ve tried and failed before, can greatly improve your relationship.

If your spouse knows they can count on you to support them no matter what they want to achieve, whether that is a better education or a trimmer waistline, they’ll feel that much more loved by you. It’s often easier and more tempting to point out this is their 7th diet in a row or that they can barely walk to the end of their own street, much harder to get out there and do it with them.

Did you make a mistake? Apologize for real.

While everyone has probably apologized without meaning it just to end a conversation, a sincere apology when you’ve done something wrong can really help in a relationship. Whether its as small as putting the ice cream in the fridge by accident, or something bigger, apologizing when you’ve done wrong can make a big difference in your relationship.

Participate in their interests

Even if you’re not wild about game night, getting special snacks and watching the game with him will show him how much you care. Perhaps your wife is wild about watching live theatre but you—not so much. Imagine how special she’ll feel when knowing that you get tickets for both of you to the Nutcracker. 

Learning to participate in their interests—to attend that marathon or go to that movie, can make a big difference in how loved your partner feels. No matter what it is, they’ll know that you value everything about them, including their interests.

Compliment them in front of others

Another thing you can do to help make your spouse feel more loved, and certainly more confident in your love, is to deliver a genuine compliment in front of others. When you brag about how great your husband’s cooking is, or how your wife can change her own flat tire, you let them know that you notice and value these things.

It’s too easy to tear people down and criticize them in front of other people, and not always so easy to say something kind or good instead. When we choose to compliment, we’re choosing to value our spouse. 

In the end, being a better spouse boils down to showing them that no matter how long you are together, you still value them. It’s the secret to long term relationships, and to keeping things fresh no matter how much time goes by. If you want to show your spouse how much you love them, these tips are a great way to start.

https://www.marriage.com/blog/relationship/how-to-be-a-better-spouse/