Can't sleep? Try this
You don’t have to understand why but u have to listen
As someone who’s suffered from insomnia (greatly) in my early 20s I, for many years had a sort of ptsd reaction when I would start to watch the hours on the clock roll by at night... fearing that this condition that had such control of me and my life was knocking on my door once again.
I recognize now, in my late 30s the occasional sleepless night is more about me having something to learn and change rather than an inability to chemically or biologically produce sleep for days on end and that it is within my power to limit it to just 1 night.
We’ve all been there, right? It’s a matter of having a lot on your mind, or a heavy topic seemingly sitting on your chest and NOT taking action. It’s about the mind needing to work with the brain to PROCESS the EMOTIONS that are showing up in the circumstances in order to solve the problems at hand.
So here’s what I do now, as a teacher and student to the art and science of wellbeing!
I pay attention.
And then mindfully distract. What? Let me explain.
If you’re in a state of anger, resentment, fear, or any really low-level vibrations you are not in a problem-solving mode, you're not geared towards solution-oriented thinking - instead, you’re probably finding more evidence from past occurrences that support your current claim. Ruminating over conversations had and NOT actually had in reality. (Right?! Have u been there before?) Go ahead and mutter these oftentimes irrational thoughts and vent it out but then make a conscious choice to shift. Don’t get stuck in the spral downward.
Move the body clear the mind
You have a couple of options, get up and move around a bit, stretch, or if it’s daytime and these intrusive thoughts are bothering you go for a walk.
Then out of your head just for a little bit.
Even if it’s 90% with a bit of mental chatter being dulled. This is intentional and short-lived. I suggest using a sitcom as a tool to bring laughter about and raise your vibes, let the steam from your figurative boiling teapot settle.
The next step is to process using thought experiments
Some may be better skilled naturally at this, but anyone can do it. Close your eyes, LIke a tree and its branches, see the multiple options available to you. Allow your mind to open up to ideas not yet acknowledged. Journey with vivid visualization from start to finish the possibilities available to you, all the while WITNESSING YOUR EMOTIONS. Use your body as the barometer to gauging your authentic response. If it’s what you truly want and desire, you will feel at ease, peaceful, tranquil. If there is a choice that elicits stress, anxiety and so forth you know not to travel down that road. From there you can proceed with the logistics or necessary planning/ with the follow through on next actions to make this path a reality. Such as sign up for a different daycare option, submitting an application for a new school, or renegotiating a crossed boundary.
Disclaimer, this works a little differently when you’re evaluating calculated risks like entrepreneurship or going outside your comfort zone for personal growth. (in that case, you can recognize your fear, thank it for trying to keep you safe in the familiar, but set it aside and choose to reframe anxiousness with excitement!)
Reign in back in with Mindfulness
So now you identified the goblin vying for your attention. You bring your awareness back from wandering, a natural state that you need not resist, and gently into the present moment, again a natural state, unecumbered by the ruminations of the past or worries of future happenings. (Which is only 20% likely to happen.) From here, you may be able to settle into the the weight of your body on the bed, the sotness of your beding against your skin and an awareness that allows you to comfortably drift off to sleep. If not, mindfulness reminds us of the temporary nature of everything- including a few elusive zz’s.